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Twins Without Soothers - Help!

Posted May 23, 2011

Hi Kitty,
 
I have spoken to you a few times, once regarding sleep training for my then 6-month old twins.  They have just turned two, and at the suggestion of our doctor, we have gotten rid of their soothers for orthodontic reasons.  We are now having sleep issues again...
 
Background Info:
 
- My twin toddlers threw away all five(!) of their soothers two weeks ago.  They did this willingly, however they LOVED their soothers and I'm not sure they are over them - while they don't ask for them, they talk about them going in the garbage.  They whine and tantrum for a very long time, when a soother used to solve this problem imediately.  I'm not sure it is related to their lack of sleep...but they don't seem to have any self-soothing techniques.
 
- They share a room, and we put them in their cribs at 7:00.  Nap during the week is at daycare, and it's length varies.  Nap during the weekend is around 12, and normally lasts for about 2 hours.
 
- Since soothers are gone, they are playing/crying/jumping and taking sleepers and sleep sacks off every tme they are in their cribs.  They now fall asleep around 9:00pm, and sometimes weekend naps are non-existent.  They have also been waking up during the night crying.
 
- We have been really inconsistent regarding sleeping since the soothers went away, and have been going back in to settle them, re-dress them, give them back their animal and blanket (which had been tossed out of the cribs).  Going in to soothe them seems to be they only thing that works...
 
- Before the soothers were gone, we were somewhat concerned that their bedtime was too early.  Now we have been experimenting with bedtimes (some nights to bed at 7:30), but it does not seem to make a difference.
 
- We are considering putting them into separate rooms within the next few months - I expect this will cause more sleep disruption.
 
I know we need to be firm, but what specifically should we be doing, and when should we be doing it?   Should we wait until they are separated to work on sleep training?  Help!  We miss our perfect sleepers!
 

I'm sure this is very frustrating, since you had such good sleepers previous to the soother removal.

I think Kristen and Peter will survive and become good sleepers again.  It's only been 2 weeks and during those weeks you've been doing a lot of re-settling, re-dressing, etc.  I am going to recommend you stop that entirely for a week (or more) and see how far they can go in solving their problem of how to get to sleep.

I advise you to keep the bedtime at 7 PM.  I would be recommending this time anyway, and besides, it gives them more time to do all their antics and still get tired and go to sleep at maybe a decent time.

Use some duct tape around their diapers, being careful not to touch skin, and put on their sleep suits backwards if possible.  If they won't fit, then buy some old-fashioned diaper pins to put under the zipper at the top so they cannot get the suits off.

Once you've said goodnight at 7 PM you do not enter the door again until 7 AM or after.  The first night the party will be heavy and so will the crying, since you've taken away some of their fun.  But on each subsequent night, I predict they will tire out more quickly as long as you are not going back in.  I'm sure that has become one of their goals, by default.

Let me know how this goes.  If you do not see improvement over the next week, then perhaps separating them will be your next move.  But let's wait and see how they do with this plan.

Thanks for writing in,

Kitty

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