Blog » Time-Outs Are Not Working!

Time-Outs Are Not Working!

Posted November 14, 2009

Dear Kitty,

My wife and i are going crazy because our 2.5 year old daughter is testing our patience constantly.  She climbs up where she isn't allowed, talks back and is whiny much of the time.  Things she isn't allowed to touch, such as our CD collection, seem to be her first targets every morning.  We've read discipline books and tried Time Outs, but she just laughs.  Why aren't they working for us?

I can certainly understand your frustration. Time-Outs vary greatly in style, from putting a child on a naughty mat or placing him on a stair - to putting him in his crib.  The only version of Time-Out I recommend in my seminar Setting Healthy Limits Age 1-5 Years, is one that begins with a startle and takes place behind a door and lasts only one minute.

The two other highly effective tools I discuss in my seminar are purposeful ignoring (this would cover whining and talking back) and fantastic babyproofing ( this would deal with the CD problem). 

Once your child reaches age three, she'll be a little more logical and be able to understand the consequences of breaking the rules you set up.  However, as you can see in my blog entry on The Oppositional Three Year Old, you won't be out of the woods - but the woods will look different.

It may help to realize that your daughter is doing exactly what she is supposed to do - which is to perform hundreds of tests to help her learn what works and what doesn't work.  The trick is to stay just one step ahead!

Kitty


Ways I can provide help:

Setting Healthy Limits Age 1-5 Years Seminar

Telephone Counseling

Email Counseling

| Subscribe to email updates for this blog

(2) comments

Filed under: Discipline

Comments

sounds like a normal curious two year old

By m.e. robinson on November 17, 2009


Indeed, and curiosity is such an important ingredient in early learning. If parents understand what to expect and have plans in place for handling these behaviors, that curiosity can be protected and so can the family’s sanity.

By kitty on November 17, 2009


Comment Form

Commenting is not available in this weblog entry.

KITTY'S BLOG IN YOUR EMAIL INBOX

Parenting Seminars
and Support

Phone Consultation with Kitty

$110.00 Book now
image
Sometimes it is most helpful to talk one-on-one to solve your parenting challenges.
Read More | 8 reviews

Email Question (Deluxe)

A popular choice - good for slightly longer parenting questions, with an in-depth response tailored to your specific situation.
Read More

Email Question (Short)

Send Kitty one short question for her practical and research-based advice.
Read More

Sleep from the Start Summary Video

image
In this condensed version of our prenatal Sleep seminar, Kitty advises parents on ways to gently sleep-train their newborn.
Read More

Sleep from Now On Summary Video

image
Help your baby, toddler or preschooler learn to sleep through the night, with this condensed version of our seminar.
Read More | 4 reviews

The Manual - 0-3 Months - eBook

image
The manual you wish came with your newborn. This is in E-book format for download and immediate access.
Read More | 2 reviews

Sleep From The Start

$60.00/family Register Now
image
Learn ahead of time how to encourage good sleep skills in your newborn. Protect feeding schedues and build a secure attachment.
Read More | 4 reviews

Sleep from Now On

$85.00/family Register Now
image
Enjoy the magic of a good night's sleep for your child and your whole family with our sleep-training method
Read More | 17 reviews

Toilet Learning the Easy Way - Summary Video

Who knew that YOU are the best model to motivate your toddler or preschooler to master the potty?
Read More

Setting Healthy Limits for Ages 1-3 Years - Summary Video

Children need parents to provide unquestioned leadership as they struggle to learn self-discipline.
Read More