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The Picky Eater - A New Perspective

Posted May 2, 2011

It is rare these days to hear of a toddler who eats really, really well.  I wonder if this is due to a generational change in the eating behavior of kids from about 1 to 4 years or if it a product of higher parental expectations.  The "Clean Plate Club" many parents remember from their own childhood seems to be seen as a negative - to be avoided - by today's parents but maybe it has simply taken on a new face. 

Higher parental expectations?  It is interesting to note that charts and "guidelines" posted and promoted at health clinics actually recommend a certain number of tablespoons of various kinds of food to be offered in a certain order to every child over 6 months.  The amounts increase according to age, of course, and the recommendations can easily give a parent the impression that 3 solid meals a day are required at an early age and that the challenges of vegetables, fruit and meat are just around the corner.

It is possible, but I would like to hear from you so I can be sure, that parents are left with the impression early on that their baby's birth weight, post-natal weight gain and toddler eating habits are urgent concerns causing some parents who fear they may be judged, to try to get their child to eat more than the child's appetite actually dictates. 

The research behind starting solid food and feeding toddlers and preschoolers stresses that parents should be relaxed and respectful of their child's tastes and appetite from day to day.  Young children become very aware of colors, smells and texture of food and they also can detect if there is parental pressure to eat.  They learn this when someone hovers over them, watching, coaxing or playing games to get them to eat more.  The pressure usually results in the child dreading mealtimes and actually eating less in the long run.

There are some resources available to you if you feel stress over how much your child eats.  I suggest the Ellen Satter book How to Get Your Child To Eat But Not Too Much.  Also, I welcome Telephone Counseling appointments (45 minutes) on the subject of feeding toddlers and preschoolers.  You and I will study the list of foods your child will eat willingly and make up a meal plan that takes into account your concerns and your child's nutritional needs. I'll help you gain insight into designing an eating environment so your child will grow up with a healthy relationship with food.

Dr. T. Berry Brazelton's magic menu for daily toddler survival: 2 pints of milk, 2 ounces of protein with iron, a little fruit and 1 multi-vitamin!

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