Blog
In parenting, how you say it really counts
Posted September 22, 2009
"Oops, it looks like you forgot the no hurting rule."
"If you throw sand again, we will go home."
"You have a very smart body. Your body knows when to pee and when to go poo and it always feels better after that."
"Here we are at preschool. What do you need to remember today." (no pushing/no grabbing)
"It's OK if you need to cry because crying will actually help you fall asleep faster.
"It can be hard going to bed but your smart body knows when it's tired. I love you and I'll see you in the morning."
"It looks like you aren't hungry right now. I'll put your plate away and you can let me know if you want it back a little later."
"It's cold outside today. Do you want to wear your jacket or have it in the bag? It's your choice."
"I know! Sometimes our hands just don't want to share. But you are in charge of your hands, so you can help them remember."
"It's time to go inside. Do you want to walk or shall I carry you?"
"Every day it will get easier for you to remember that rule."
"I know it's hard to go to bed wometimes but your smart body knows when it is tired. I love you and I'll see you in the morning."
"It's really important for the door to stay closed (locked) all night long in order to keep you safe. I'll open it at breakfast time."
"It's OK to cry because crying will actually help you fall asleep sooner.
" You are doing a really good job."
Filed under: Discipline, Daily Routines, Feeding and Eating, Sleep, Toilet Learning
Guarding Your Child’s Free Time
Posted September 1, 2009
(class offering): "Free Time, ages 0-16 years, Tuesday / Thursday afternoons, 3PM to 6Pm. Cost: negligable; Location: your home."
If you were to run across this listing in the extra-curricular booklets for fall '09 would you register for it? Would you sign your child up for it? As school resumes, preschool starts and gym/swim or music lessons begin I would like to put in a word in favor of free time for your child.
Historically, free time had a good reputation. Everybody wanted some so they made it for themselves and gave it to their children.
Times have changed; now, keeping busy is more highly valued - it almost doesn't matter with what. Playdates, swimming, piano, basketball, hockey, gymnastics, choral activities and more playdates. If you child has a free afternoon you might feel almost apologetic about it, explaining to friends that you tried to get her into the such-and-such for 7 year olds program but it was full.
For emotional health, children need free time. This means time without TV or computers games, without homework or chores.
"But mom, that sounds so boring! I don't want free time. I want to have a friend over or go somewhere."
Mom says: "Those things will happen on other days. Thursday afternoons are saved especially for you to be able to do nothing or do 100 things. But you have to think of them yourself and learn to spend time with yourself. You have a science kit, you can read, you can pretend or have the water on in the back yard. You can play outside or inside and do whatever you want to do."
"I don't want to do anything! "
Mom says: "That is a normal way to feel at first but soon you may start looking forward to your quiet Thursday afternoons, when this special time is saved just for you."
Filed under: Daily Routines, Interesting Parenting Matters, Play
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